Secrets
by Sapphire Dawn
Summary: Due to a harrowing experience her oldest daughter has had, Audra and her husband wind up telling her a secret they have kept from most everyone for thirty years.
1. Chapter 1

**Secrets **

**Chapter One**

Audra Barkley Leech stood upon her balcony watching her two daughters, their husbands, their children and her three sons gathering in the yard below the balcony, along with her oldest son's fiancée. Her eyes fell upon Candace, her oldest daughter, and she sighed. They say secrets exist within every family or individual. Many try to deny that and say others are being too pessimistic. As she stood there upon the balcony of the home she had shared with her husband of thirty years, she did not deny such a thing. She could not. She and her family; that is, her late mother, her two living brothers, Heath and Gene, and her husband were the only ones who knew her and Alexander's secret.

Again, she gazed upon her oldest. The fact that Candace was the spitting image of her was a blessing she would be forever grateful for. It meant as far as the "good" people living in Stockton, now or in years past, knew Candace was definitely her mother's daughter. When her husband, the dark haired, broad shouldered, Alexander Leech slipped his arms around her waist and pulled her into a warm, firm brace, Audra sighed.

"You really shouldn't look back." He whispered as he kissed her on the side of the head. His wife seldom acted like this; only, when she did, it was always over "that" matter. He hated to see her torment herself like this. "What good does it do? It wasn't your fault, and the man is dead, hung by his own hand."

Audra turned her head and smiled at him. "I can't help it today; after what almost happened to Candace the other day…" she shuddered as she thought on what her husband and oldest son had stopped. If it weren't for those two, who knows what would have happened.

Knowing their daughter was still shaken up by the events of the previous day, Alexander told Audra, "She's coming up to talk to you later; I asked her to and, no, I haven't told her. She needs to hear it though. She needs to know you can do more than feel sympathy for her." He felt his wife stiffen and then relax. She knew he was right. When he left go of her and left the room, Audra prepared for her daughter to appear. When the young woman did, she looked rather confused.

"Father said you wanted to talk to me?" Her voice was soft and she looked scared. Did her mother blame her for what Jeremy Wilson tried to do? Was she going to give her a lecture or what?

Audra sat down, smiled sadly and pointed to the chair next to hers. "I have a story that I think you need to know, only please, do not repeat it to your siblings or anyone else." That rose Candace's curiosity and she sat down, waiting for her mother to begin.

"It was the winter of Eighteen Seventy-Nine…."

**0000**

Audra sat next to Jarrod and across from her mother as the train sped toward Stockton; she sat in the seat by the window. Jarrod was finally remarrying and had been visiting his in-laws to be while she and her mother had spent some time shopping. She'd actually had a choice, stay home and visit her cousin, Rebecca, or go shopping. Since visiting Rebecca meant spending the majority of time in the kitchen, it hadn't been hard to choose. After all, everyone knew how much she, Audra, hated baking of any kind. After a thousand burnt dinner or deserts, the young woman had swore whoever she married better be at least wealthy enough to afford a part time cook! As it was, she'd not only got to look at beautiful dresses; she'd also met a couple of nice looking gentlemen.

"Audra?" Victoria tapped her daughter on the shoulder as the young woman had heard nothing of the conversation that Jarrod and she, Victoria, had been having. If she had, Victoria knew Audra would have had a temper tantrum. "It would be nice if you would join the conversation."

Audra was embarrassed at being caught not listening and blushed. "Sorry, mother. I guess I let my mind wander."

Jarrod and his mother exchanged knowing glances. They swore Audra went through more boyfriends that she did dresses. No wonder her brothers were kept on their toys all the time. If they didn't, who knows who she'd choose to date? As it was, she'd already had the stupid luck of coming up with some pretty good losers.

"We were talking about Margaret." Margaret was Jarrod's fiancée. "That is how she has asked if her cousins Teresa and Alexander Leech, along with his business partner, Miles Garrett, can come to the ranch for a visit. Well, Teresa is coming strictly for a visit. Alexander and Miles both have some business to take care of. Teresa will need someone to show her around Stockton." Jarrod gave Audra his Pappy look.

Audra wanted to groan. Teresa and her brother, Alexander, had been out to the ranch the year before. Alexander was okay; all the Barkleys liked him. Teresa was another story; just the thought of "that woman" coming again was enough to Audra nausea. The woman talked through her noise and always had a book in her hand. If Audra even mentioned dresses, shopping or boys, the girl looked as if she' have heart failure. If her mother and Jarrod were talking about having visitors and the ranch and that included Teresa, then it meant she and Jarrod expected Audra to play the part of gracious hostess. How could you be a hostess to anyone who refused can't their nose out of their book long enough to even have a chance to look at you? "I have to help out at the orphanage for a solid week, maybe two, when we get home. How am I supposed to show her around Stockton?"

Her mother gave her a reprimanding stare while Jarrod shot her one of his Pappy looks. "You aren't helping out there all day." Victoria reminded her gently, but firmly. "It will be good for both of you."

Audra wanted to say something along the lines of 'yeah, whatever', but she didn't; she knew better. She turned back towards the window, but not before consenting to help the young woman. Though, her consent to do so did not make her feelings just disappear.


	2. Chapter 2

**Secrets Chapter Two**

Audra, who always grew overanxious when she thought on what had happened, had convinced Candace to go on a walk around their land which was actually connected to her family's ranch, now run by her brother Heath, his sons, and the sons of her late brother, Nick. She'd only been able to convince her to do it after assuring her that Alexander and Candace's brother, the one who had helped stop Mr. Wilson in his tracks, would be close by.

Candace wondered if her mother was going to tell her something that happened between her father and her, as Audra had told her how instantly she and Alexander had been attracted to each other. Well, that and she was telling of the many picnics, rides and dances they had gone to once Teresa had grown tired of Stockton and insisted on returning home. She said, because of the stupid luck she'd had too many times, she had insisted on taking it slow with Alexander…hence the reason for so many dates once Alexander and Miles Garrett had decided to move their business to Stockton. The two were into shipping various items and Alexander would occasionally do some investigation work, hence the business relationship he had with Jarrod. She was shocked to find out differently.

"Your father and I were so busy courting each other that the only thing we noticed was that your uncles were keeping him under close scrutiny," Audra told her as the two sat down underneath the shade of a huge live oak tree. The two could see Alexander and Morgan, her oldest son was named after her brother, Heath Morgan, who had been the rock that she had come to lean on during a period of time that her husband had gone missing for six months, stood keeping guard. Not that her other brothers hadn't been of a great service, but for whatever reason, it had been Heath to whom she had turned. It had surprised both of them, as it had always been Jarrod she had turned to before that. After all, he was Pappy to everyone. Then again, he had remarried and lived, for the most part, in Stockton with his wife and children, when he wasn't in San Francisco or back in Washington.

Candace found herself nervous as she heard her mother say the words 'the only thing we noticed.' Somehow, she instinctively knew that those words were implying that there had been something going on that was major, and whatever it was had been hidden from the majority of people all these years. A portion of her wanted to push her mother to talk faster; the other half was afraid of what was coming and that part kept quiet. All she could do was wait for her mother to begin talking again.

"It wasn't until your father and I were getting quite serious that I began getting small inklings something else had been going on right under our noses. Only I didn't pay attention to those inklings as I should have," Audra's eyes again took on a look of someone who had her mind in the past.

**0000**

Audra had been standing in front of the orphanage watching the young children playing. When she saw Alexander and Miles approaching with a wagonload of boxes, she naturally assumed they had brought the items the good father had ordered for the orphanage. She was quite startled when Elizabeth, one of the older girls in the orphanage, looked at the approaching men, got a terrified look on her face, and turned and ran inside the orphanage as if her life depended on it. What on the earth was the matter with that girl lately? Everything seemed to spook her and she seemed to be angry a lot too.

"Hello, Audra," Alexander gave her quick hug and peck on the cheek, as nothing else would be appropriate for a lady, and he insisted on treating her like a lady. It was then, for the first time, that she noticed Miles looking at her. She wasn't sure of what to make of the look in his eyes and it made her nervous. She quickly pushed the uneasy feeling aside and turned her attention to Alexander. After all, he was talking about the blankets and gifts they'd brought for the children. Audra noticed how the children, especially the older girls, shied away from the Mr. Garrett. She told herself it was just because Mr. Garrett didn't have the luck of being as outgoing as Alexander was.

"You can take the boxes into the sheds over there," Audra pointed to the three sheds that stood behind the orphanage, "I'll go get Father Thomas." Because Alexander had his eyes on the boxes as he unloaded, he missed the look his partner continued giving Audra before the man turned his attention to unloading of the boxes.

At this point in the story, Candace found her heart racing and she interrupted her mother. Her mother had mentioned how Miles Garrett was well liked and thought of by all the adults in and around Stockton. "Mr. Garrett wasn't the nice man everyone thought he was, was he?"

Her mother didn't answer at first, her own heart racing. Nice? Oh sure, the man knew how to be nice to people, but the man hid another part of his life well, too well. Audra found herself shaking her head and letting out a disgusted laugh, as she replied, "No, no he wasn't…only not very many people knew that. The few who did were scared out of their wits when it came to Mr. Garrett and, once they found out it was too late, they were too ashamed to come forth and say anything. They blamed themse…." Her voice broke off as she turned her head away. She had to or tears would have burst forth before she was finished.

All of a sudden, Candace knew what was coming. Well, knew at least a part of it. She hurried to stop her mother. "If you don't want to talk about it mother, you don't have to tell me anything."

She was surprised when her mother let out an almost eerie laugh and looked back at her. "Yes, I do. Your father is right. Whether or not you like it, you need to be told. You need to know you're not alone. In fact, you're luckier than many. Will you listen?"

A part of Candace wanted to scream no, but her mother was right. A part of her did need to hear what the woman had to say, needed to know others knew how she felt at the moment.


	3. Chapter 3

**Secrets **

**Chapter Three**

"What?" Alexander stared at the good father as the man had just informed him that, according to his request, Mr. Garret had picked up Audra and was taking her to meet Heath at some of their friends. "We asked him to do no such thing? Heath isn't even around! How long ago did they leave and which way did he go?"

Confused the good man point in the west direction, and then watched as Alexander tore off at lightning speed on his horse. Alexander would have liked to send word to the Barkley brothers and tell them exactly what was going on. He couldn't though, Jarrod was back in Washington, Gene was back in school and Heath, along with Nick had just left on a cattle drive. The more Alexander thought on it, the more he began seeing subtle signs that he should have noticed before. He got a bitter taste in his mouth and swore in his wrath that if his "good" friend didn't have an acceptable reason for lying about why he had picked Audra up at the orphanage, under the disguise of a lie, the man would pay.

As Alexander rode hard, having actually picked up a trail to follow, Mr. Garrett was talking to a very oblivious Audra. That is, she was still totally unaware of what Mr. Garret's true intentions were. When they came to a fork in the road, Mr. Garret acted totally innocent by asking if it was alright if he showed her a small pond he'd found. "It's beautiful. I've told Alexander he should show you some time; he's just too busy lately." Miles Garret smiled and spoke other things making it so Audra truly believed he simply wanted to show her the pond. Truth was, she'd seen it many times before, but since the man was a family friend, the inklings she'd just gotten at the orphanage were pushed aside. After all, she figured she could trust him.

Once they got to the pond, he helped her down and walked beside her to the pond, never attempting to hold her hand or anything. It was yet another thing that cemented the fact that he was simply doing a good deed for the day. Audra took a deep breath and enjoyed the smell of the fresh outdoor air. When she started walking around the pond, Mr. Garret's eyes began changing their appearance. Though she was talking while she walked, he scarcely heard a word.

"There's another pond that lies on the other side of the bushes." He spoke up.

Audra was startled for two reasons. She' never seen any other pond, and there was something funny in his voice. Still, colds were going around and she told herself the man was having the misfortune of starting one. She headed for the bushes. Too late did she realize that the only thing on the other side of the bushes were more bushes. By that time Mr. Garret had her pinned to a tree and he had a wild look in his eyes. If that wasn't enough to frighten her, his next words did.

"I've had enough of your teasings. You should know better than to flaunt yourself around the way you've been doing this past year!"

What on earth was he talking about? She had done no such thing! She struggled to get free and told him he was imagining things that she had never willing flirted with anyone but Alexander, and he was he beau. Her heart started pounding and she started screaming as Mr. Garret ignored her and put his mouth on her neck. Her eyes widened even more and she screamed even louder.

Why hadn't she waited at the orphanage? Even with the things Mr. Garret had said, why had she believed him? Hadn't Alexander said he'd come for her when he was through. Why had she believed him when he talked about another pond? When Mr. Garrett began pushing her to the ground, Audra let out another piercing scream and tried to get away, only to have him reach out and grab a hold of her dress; it ripped in half. Soon he had her pinned to the ground and kissing her and touching her in places he had no business being. By the time he started putting his fire out Audra was whimpering and crying.

Candace felt sick to her stomach as her mother closed her moistened eyes and did what she could to calm her trembling nerves. How could men like Garret and Wilson live with themselves? Preying on innocent girls and women, the men should be taken out and shot. Okay, shooting anyone was against the law, but they sure deserved it. As she thought on it some more, Candace grew even sicker. If this happened in the winter of 1879…she gasped and looked at her mother, whose eyes were still closed. "Is that man my biological father?" That idea made her even sicker to her stomach.

At first there was no answer given. Audra couldn't answer at first, she too was, again, sick to her stomach. Slowly though, she regained her composure and looked at her daughter. "I don't know." She sighed as she let out another disgusted, half laugh. "He dressed himself and stood laughing at me. He told me I was a slut for enticing men the way I had him. I never enticed him in any way! However, it wasn't until later that I fully accepted there was no truth to what he said; he was just blaming anyone he could for his own actions. Anyway, Alexander, who had gotten close enough to where we were hidden to hear my last scream, had finally gotten an idea of where we were and what was really going on. I heard his footsteps, but I didn't know who was coming. I gathered up my clothes in my arms and hid while Mr. Garrett tore off in the other direction."

"How did father find you then? I mean, if you were hiding?" Candace asked. Audra sighed and explained.

Alexander stepped through the bushes and looked around. He knew he'd heard Audra screaming. Where was she? Where was Miles Garret? Just as he was about to leave, he heard a faint whimper and soft crying. His heart skipped a beat as he hurried toward the sound. When Audra came into sight, Alexander got both sick and furious. Up to that point, Alexander hadn't wanted to believe the rumblings he'd heard in the past, the ones that said Miles Garrett was a sick man and not to be trusted. Now, fury raged through him as he realized what his "good friend" had done to Audra.

He quickly knelt down and taking, Audra's turned down face into his gentle hands, lifted it up. "I still have some of the clothing we got for the orphanage in a bag on the side of my horse. I think one of the dresses would fit you. Do you want me to get it?"

A part of her wanted to scream at him that it was a stupid question to ask someone in her condition, but she simply nodded. Her head knew he was only trying to help. It didn't take long for him to find a simple blue dress and bring it back. After handing it to her, Alexander turned away from her and faced forward. While he had no intention of betraying her in that way, Alexander wanted to show her he really did care…for the right reasons. So he showed her respect the only way he knew how. Though, while she dressed, he swore to hunt Miles down and make him pay for what he had done.

"He didn't have to." Audra told her. "Others found him hanging from a tree, hung by his own hand. Though, that was a fact we were not to find out until days later. I guess he knew who found me and who would be coming after him later. He took the coward's way out."

"But you said you didn't know if he was my father or not. How come?" Candace was confused and she didn't like that.

Audra sighed as she stood up. "It's getting close to dinner time. I will tell you the rest after we eat. Again, please, tell no one afterwards. Though, if you feel a strong need to, you will have four people you can talk to if you need to."

While Audra didn't say it, her daughter figured she meant her father, Alexander, and her uncles, Heath and Gene. However, she didn't press for her mother to come out and admit it at that time. Why should she? Her mother had promised to tell her the rest of the story later, and she always kept her promises. "Okay."


	4. Chapter 4

**Secrets **

**Chapter Four**

Since Candace's husband was going out of town on business, she was spending the next few days with her family. With the things her mother had told her, it was a good thing. Once dinner was over her sister, Rose and her brother-in-law loaded up their three children and headed home. Her brothers headed out to do their evening chores, except for her oldest brother, Morgan. He had to take his fiancée home before it grew dark. Once everyone was out of the house, she sat down in the living room with her mother surprised, but not shocked, to see her father join them. Nor was she surprised when her mother gave her a small smile and informed her that she'd asked Alexander to join them.

"Your mother wanted me to tell you the next part of the story. She figures I should tell you a part of it, and I agree." Alexander held himself with dignity while he sat in his chair. Candace smiled to herself. Her father had always been an honorable man. Maybe not perfect, but who was? So she sat quietly and listened as he spoke.

** 0000 ****  
**  
Alexander was relieved for Audra's sake to find no one working near the house when they arrived. He wasted no time in helping her down from his horse, still wrapped up in the blanket he'd been carrying. He also wasted no time in getting her inside. The sooner they were inside, the less chance of anyone seeing them. While they did not know it at the time, that was a good thing. No sooner were they in the house than McCall and a few of the other men rode into the yard. Used to seeing Mr. Leech's horse outside the house, the men went about their business with no clue anything was wrong.

Once inside Alexander led Audra, who was naturally still very much upset, up to her bedroom where she got some new clothes while he waited outside her door, both were grateful no one was home. He then asked her if she wanted to take a bath. Not knowing what Garrett had done to himself, Alexander promised he'd stand guard in front of the door if it would make her feel better. The simple gesture brought a lump to Audra's throat; all she could do was nod and go inside.

"I kept that promise," Alexander said as he smiled upon his wife, "But I won't lie and say it was easy. What I really wanted to do was confide in McCall as he was an extremely good, trustworthy fellow, have him guard the door and go after Miles Garrett. Looking back at it, I guess it was a good thing he hung himself; I'd have killed him with my bare hands." He would have too, he thought as he went on with the story.

Over the next couple of days, but before they'd heard the news about Mr. Garrett, Alexander had time to think. He knew what the possible outcome of Audra's traumatic experience might be. He also knew, while she bore no blame, society would lay it at her feet. He didn't want that for her. No, he'd rather take a thousand beatings from Nick and a couple hundred from her other brothers before he would willing stand by and watch society lay the condemnation upon her doorstep. The more he thought about it, the more he realized he'd rather be by her side suffering any shame the good people of Stockton would hand out should it come out that a man had lain with her before marriage. While he felt like thinking on all the possible choices that could be made, he wasn't going to start tossing ideas around before he had a chance to sit down with Audra and discuss it.

** 0000 ****  
**  
Alexander knocked on the Barkleys door, hoping Audra would be home. In a matter of minutes, Silas answered the door and let Alexander in. Silas then excused himself as he had to go into town. Victoria, who had been sitting down in the parlor, stood up and welcomed her daughter's beau.

"I came to talk to Audra," Alexander looked around, "Is she home?"

Victoria frowned slightly and said Audra had not been herself the past few days and wasn't sure she'd agree to see anyone, but she went to get her anyway. She was pleasantly surprised when her daughter was willing to see Alexander. Once Audra was in the parlor, Alexander asked her if they could talk outside in the garden. Feeling sure she knew what he wanted to talk about, Audra told her mother she was leaving with Alexander for some fresh air.

Once Alexander and Audra were in the garden, she sat on the bench while he leaned against a tree. She could tell something was troubling Alexander and, for a small moment, she thought she knew what was coming. He loved her, but he didn't want "damaged goods" for a wife. He seemed to sense what she was thinking as she lowered her eyes and head. "Don't," he said as stepped away from the tree, reached out and lifted up her head, "Don't ever lower your head as if you're ashamed of yourself. You have done nothing wrong! None of this is your fault!"

His firm affirmation of her innocence reached out and wrapped itself around Audra; it felt as if someone had taken her favorite blanket and draped it around her. Tears started rolling down her cheeks as she found herself being pulled, gently, into his embrace. "I…I c…could be carrying that man's child right now," she started sobbing harder.

"Maybe," Alexander laid his hand upon her shoulder and spoke softly, "Doesn't matter; I still love you." He smiled at her and then said, "Now, as hard as it is, we need to put our emotions aside and talk." He sincerely wished that was not the case, only it was.

Silence fell between the two for a few moments as bird sweetly in the trees, such a contrast to what the garden's two occupants were feeling. Finally, Alexander spoke. "I meant what I said, Audra. None of this is your fault, and Mr. Garrett will pay once I get my hands on him." He then pointed out the fact that she'd already stated; she could very well have conceived a child. Then, very slowly, out of fear she might take things wrong, he told her it didn't matter to him if there was a child and it wasn't his, but did she feel like she could do the child justice, knowing Garrett was the father?

Audra hesitated and then started crying; she said it would be so much easier to do right by the child if he was the father and she didn't know what to do. That is, if she found out later she was with child.

The moment she said that, Alexander found himself with an idea he'd never dreamt he'd ever have. "I have an idea, if you'll go for it. I will _not _force it on you." He sat down next to Audra and clasped his hands together, looking rather unsure of how to approach the subject, especially since he knew many would condemn him for even suggesting it in the first place. He just didn't know any other way he could honestly lay claim to any child she might carry.

Audra could see whatever he was thinking was serious. _"If you'll go for it…"_ She didn't know why; she didn't know how, but at that moment she knew what his idea was. Her eyes widened not only in surprise, but in amazement he was willing to help cover up the rape for her sake. "If there's a child, you…we," she wiped her tears away and sat up straight, "We'd never know for sure if it was his or yours. Could you really live with that?"

Alexander nodded as he moved his hands to the top of her shoulders. "Let me show you how a man who really loves a woman treats her. If later, you do find out you're with child we can honestly tell people we laid together. As long as we don't tell them what happened, no one will question the child's parentage. Or, if you wish, we can lie together and then go confess to the reverend and ask him to marry us. Yes, as much as that man talks it would be all over town, but we'd be married. No matter what though, the choice is yours. I'll _not_ tell you what you have to decide. Just know, no matter what, I'm here for you."

Audra held onto Alexander tightly. What he proposed would surely earn a beating from at least one brother, Nick, and maybe some from the others. Again, he seemed to know what she was thinking. "Don't worry about me, Audra. I'll take a thousand whippings for you and I'll go to the ends of the earth to do right by you, always. I promise."

Audra nodded and looked up at him, love and gratitude in her eyes. She also knew what she wanted. "Right or wrong, please, love me; show me how it's supposed to be. Just forgive me, unless there's a child conceived, I can't promise to marry you today."

Alexander understood and nodded. "That's okay," he answered as he took her hand and led her out of the garden and to his horse. Quickly, the two mounted and rode until they found a seclude area where no one would see them. Alexander kissed Audra's forehead and once again vowed to her that he would stand by her side no matter what. When she started to beg his forgiveness for what had happened, he lifted her chin up and firmly restated there was nothing to forgive her of as she had done nothing wrong. He begged her to believe that. "I promise you, Audra, I'll show you what's it's really supposed to be like and I will not desert you ever." He lowered his head and pulled her gently to him.

He kept his promise to her. He loved her with everything he had, slowly and carefully, all time assuring her his feelings for her hadn't changed and that she had done nothing wrong. By the time the fire reached its peak he wasn't the only one with a need to have the two of them connected. Though he once again, not knowing there was no need for it, swore to hunt Miles Garret down.


	5. Chapter 5

Secrets Chapter Five

It is said time stands still for no man, and assuredly this was true for Alexander and Audra. After lying together, loving each other like a man and woman should, Alexander kept his promise to her, the one he'd made while he'd made love to her. He came by every day, took her horseback riding, to church, and to a dozen other things; no one could deny the two had become a steady couple. During that time the two did a lot of talking, lighthearted and serious, though they never crossed that line again. That was something they had promised they would only do when they did indeed marry…whether it was because they'd been caught or whether they just simply married with no extra feet on the way.

Then it happened. Audra woke up feeling rather sick and had to make a beeline to the bathroom. It was only when she was through getting rid of the supper from the night before that she realized she was late for her time of the month. Maybe it was just a coincidence? She didn't know, but she hurried and cleaned up, dressed and went downstairs as if nothing was wrong. She would not do anything in haste until she was sure.

The moment her daughter sat down, Victoria knew something was up. Actually, she'd known for weeks something was amiss. After all, the bubbly, outgoing young woman had turned into a more serious adult, not that her sense of humor was gone mind you. Though Victoria tried, she hadn't been able to get a word out of her daughter, even if it was nothing more than to be told not to worry about it; she was fine. Now, she was too quiet and the look on her face was too serious. All her brothers noticed it too, even Gene. The young man was home from college for a visit. Naturally they were all concerned.

"You okay, Audra?" Gene asked eyeing his sister carefully.

"I'm fine, just a little under the weather is all," Audra forced a smile on her face as she answered. She wasn't surprised when each of her brothers started to give her one piece of advice after another. Thank goodness her mother put a stop to it, telling her if she was coming down sick she should take it easy for the day. Audra might have tried saying she'd be fine except Silas brought breakfast out at that moment. Normally, she would have started grinning from ear to ear. As it was, she found the smell of eggs and bacon actually turned her stomach. Before she knew it, Audra had to bolt from the room and run to the nearest bathroom; they had two since the house was so big. That meant she didn't have to worry about the stairs.

"I don't like that," Nick, who had also noticed the change in his sister, set down his fork, "She's coming down with something." Before anyone had a chance to say anything a knock came at the door. Nick went to answer it and was surprised to see Alexander on the other end. He was even more surprised when the man said he'd gotten up that morning with the strongest feeling that someone was telling him to go to the Barkley's home and check on Audra.

"Tell me I'm going crazy," Alexander said as he stepped inside, "You won't be the first."

Nick's only answer was to nod in the direction of the downstairs bathroom and say, "She not feeling well this morning. You're taking a chance coming here and visiting."

The moment Alexander heard the words he just knew what was going on, but he wanted to hear from Audra whether or not he was right or wrong. "I'll take my chances. I'll wait in the parlor." He headed for the parlor while Nick, who was eyeing him with wonder, went to tell Audra she had company.

**0000**

"When my brother knocked on that bathroom door," Audra turned to her daughter, "I just knew what he wanted. I don't know how I knew, but I did. I also felt strongly that I was indeed carrying a child inside of me," She paused and looked with love upon her husband, "I don't know how I kept my voice so calm, but I told Nick to let your father know I'd be there once I was able to stand up without having to kneel back down." When Audra fell back into silence, Alexander began speaking  
again.

**0000**

Alexander was standing by the fireplace when Audra walked in. She didn't say a word as she walked up in front of the fireplace and stood next to him, though she looked into the fireplace. Very carefully, he laid his hand upon her shoulder, a gesture that Audra was again eternally grateful for. He was always gentle with her. Because her family was in the dining room eating, they kept their voices low, not wanting anyone to over hear their conversation.

"Nick says you're not feeling well," Alexander gazed with genuine concern at her.

"No, I'm not. I threw up first thing this morning and the smell of breakfast is making me sick," She lowered her voice even more, "I haven't had that time of the month either. I think," she said as she turned her head and looked up into his face needing to see that he'd not change his mind once he heard the actual words, "I think I'm going to have a baby."

Alexander would have taken her into his arms and assured her everything would be all right, but unfortunately Nick, who had only returned to the dining room long enough to tell the family they had company, had returned and heard her last words. His explosion sounded throughout the house. "You think what!" Audra and Alexander whirled around, but before they had a chance to say anything Nick had crossed the room and had sent his one fist across Alexander face and the other one into his abdomen. Audra screamed and dropped down to where Alexander was lying on the floor doubled up in pain, making sure she was between the only man she could accept as the father of the child inside her and her irate brother.

Nick's bellowing and Audra's scream brought everyone else in the house running. Naturally, Victoria demanded to know what the problem was; something that Nick was more than willing to tell her. Everyone looked shocked as they looked on Audra holding Alexander in her arms. Both Audra and Alexander looked a bit defiant. No one had to ask if what Nick had said was true; they knew it was.

**0000**

"Your grandmother took Audra into another room to talk to her, but only after making your uncles swear not to lay another hand on me," Alexander grinned from ear to ear, "But that doesn't mean they didn't lay into me in other ways. Brother Nick's was the loudest when it came to what he thought of me and Brother Jarrod's was the most serious. Your Uncle Heath didn't say much," Alexander smiled, "At least not then. He did give me a piece of his mind later, in private, as did Gene, who seemed to forget the no more hitting bit. By the way, your Uncle Gene hits about as hard as your Uncle Nick did. I dare say if it weren't for Heath I'd have suffered more than one broken rib. Anyway, since your mother has never played the part of a loose woman, and we had never said a word about what Miles Garrett did, there was no question as to whom your father was. By the time noon rolled around Heath had ridden into Stockton, gotten the preacher and his wife, and brought them back to the ranch. They didn't have to ask why we were marrying without a formal wedding; they weren't blind. The way your Uncle Nick kept glaring at me and eyeing the rifles, they would have had to be pure stupid not to know. It was months, no, I think close to a year before Nick and your other uncles saw fit to forgive me for what I had done to their sister. It was all right though; I knew they not only didn't know the truth about the situation, but that they only acted out of love for your mother. The only reason your Uncle Heath and Uncle Gene know anything is because they accidently overheard us talking after your Uncle Nick's funeral. After coming out of shock, they told us they'd keep our secret. After all, so many years had passed why say anything?"

"So, Grandma Barkley and Uncle Jarrod never knew either?" Candace only vaguely remembered her Uncle Jarrod as he'd died from heart problems when she was only ten.

Audra spoke up, "Jarrod never knew, but my mother, once we were alone, demanded that I tell her the whole story." Audra then chuckled as she said, "Your grandmother was one very intelligent woman and knew her children well. I told her everything. She didn't agree with the way we had handled things, but she understood. She thought we should tell my brothers, but at the time I just couldn't handle what I thought their reactions might be. Seeing how the idea upset me so, and she was concerned for the child I carried, mother promised to keep our secret."

Candace stood up and ran to her father, hugging him for all she was worth telling him that if, by some wild chance, Mr. Garrett had actually fathered her, she would pray for the rest of her life never to be told that fact. As far as she was concerned, Alexander Leech was the only man to have ever had her mother. That brought a lump to her father's throat and a smile to her mother's face.

Once her daughter was again sitting down, Audra turned to Candace. "We want you to understand we only tell you now so you will understand one thing…what Mr. Wilson tried to do to you, would have done had your father and brother not gotten to you when they did, is not your fault. We speak from experience, not just from opinion. It's not right the way society blames the woman when something like this happens. I'm sure there are those who do indeed entice men and then try to say they didn't. Only truth is, those numbers are small compared to the innocent ones. I hope you understand." Then, due to some afterthought, Audra and Alexander told her that if she wanted she could confide in her husband, but only him. After all, it wasn't good for couples to have secrets from each other.

**Epilogue ****  
**  
Candace understood Audra and Alexander very well. After her husband returned, Candace pulled him aside and told him everything. She had to hide a chuckle as the man exploded and asked if someone could invent time travel so he could wring Mr. Garrett's neck before he hung himself. The couple then became involved in efforts to help young girls who were not so fortunate to have an Alexander in their lives, telling people never to assume they had all the facts and that they had no right to judge these women so harshly. Audra and Alexander were their strongest allies. Over the years, their efforts stretched from one end of California to the other. In fact, by the time their children laid Candace and her husband to rest, they had taken over five hundred unwed mothers into their own home and helped place hundreds, if not thousands, of babies into loving, caring homes.


End file.
